I missed ya, what else can I say? I also wanted to share these status updates with you. Sometimes I would vent clever witticisms into my Twitter feed, but other times I just jotted (iPhone Notes noted) them down for sharing later. Here, in no particular order, are some of the status updates I didn't share with the world (until now):
-Stayin' classy: I just put on an apron to make hot dogs.
-Took "complete 5 Guys online survey" out of my to-do pile. Still remaining are campsite reservation form to complete and Time Warner bill to pay. Priorities, people, gotta live by 'em.
-Sometimes small-world syndrome is cool, other times it sucks epic donkey d*ck.
-Ever see someone on the subway and want to tell them "I like your jeans/sweater/khakis, your mom has great taste!" ? FYI: It makes for a way less awkward ride if you just think it.
-While wearing earphones: even if you can't hear your farts, other people can.
-If 3 Mexicans get on an empty subway car, will their volume still make it sound as if they've been separated in a forest?
-Why is the guy from the TGI Friday's commercial making people do wacky sh*t for money? If this is what I'm missing by not watching T.V., it ain't much.
-When I see hipsters on my platform I have to wonder how they got here from BK. That trek can be epic...but I guess it just means they had more time to write bad poetry in their journals (pronounced: gur-nals).
-Discovery: Buying relish is for people too lazy to chop up pickles. I make it fresh!
-Just waded through a sea of green douches streaming down 7th Ave. Must be St. Patrick's Day.
-About to go all Tim Robbins on this car alarm.
-It really never gets old that my # was somehow "leaked" on the internets as Rhianna's, thus opening the door for random yahoos to call & text me. Really. Never.
-Sparkley donuts from Starbucks are like little glittery pieces of heaven covered in crack.
-Easter feels like my own special holiday because there are bunnies everywhere! It makes me very hoppy.
-If you're already an asshole & then you put on a bigass vintage hat, you look like even more of an asshole. Yes you do.
-Naps are for people who can sleep while wearing (or not wearing) anything. I am of this subset.
-Subway rides sometimes enable overly personal details to emerge from strangers, like if they are partial to Bath & Body Works' "Warm Vanilla Sugar" lotion...or that they aren't partial to bathing at all.
-Hells YES I wanna Fanta!!
-Had to wear a dress all day as an extra for a work project...they even made me put on tights...my kingdom for some trackpants, mofo.
-My bunwah is doing her calisthenics, gearing up for the Big Show this Sunday.
-They put a 7-11 on 8th & 37th. Slurpeeeeeeees!!!
-I want to faceplant on Facecbook.
It's good to be back on FB!!! But this was fun too...
xo
Monday, April 12, 2010
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Day 46 (aka THE LAST DAY!)
Maybe you'll see the people you're supposed to even if you don't "make an event" out of it. But I'll get to that later...
Anyway, what up thugs? Sorry for tapering off in these ever important last days, but fortunately my life is full of so much sh*t that I sometimes don't even have the time to write about it all. I say fortunately because the sh*t causing me to fall asleep on my couch every night around 9PM is daylight hours full of scrambling to pull shoots together, which is fancy talk for "I'm employed." Also there's the extracurriculars like
- dinner with a dear friend & his BF up from O-town
- Bob Schneider
- the the real beer garden
- doing my taxes and finding out I'm getting a phat refund
- The Hold Steady
Which brings me to this:
How could I be mad at this man for making me tired and useless to the blawg-o-sphere? He rocked my f*cking socks off last night, and that's exactly what I needed after this b-a-n-a-n-a-s week. Becoming utterly exhausted by jumping, yelling along and getting mashed around with the sweaty bodies of other drunk happy people is its own form of expression. It's like f*cking all your closest friends, who also happen to be complete strangers. I woke up bleary-eyed but bushy-tailed this AM to check my work email for some last minute details of a project happening on Monday - still wearing a bright blue plastic over-21 bracelet and smiling, with ridiculous hair mussed up from the Grade-A pure rockin':
Rock is like rainbows, people. It's magical and beautiful, and when it happens it's like the sun is shining just for you.
Ok, enough, I'm obvi still high on the Steady. So, I was supposed to go to the show last night w/ my BFFNYC (not to be confused w/ my BFFTPA or my BFFNYACK), but she had to cancel at the last minute so I went alone. I love to be alone, we know this, so I happily filled up a coffay cup with wine to pre-game and jumped on Metro-North because the show was north of the city in a place called Ardsley. I was thoroughly rocked, drunk on Captain Lawrence and good feelings. While working on my last-call beer and about to call a cab to take me back to the train station, I heard someone say my name.
me- Wha?
Ryan- It is you! I was like, that looks like...and then I was like no IT IS!
me- Dude!
Ryan- Dude!
me- Dude.
And the conversation continued...As it turns out my friend Ryan, who I know from our college days back in FL, is a die-hard Hold Steady fan too and had also come up (from Brooklyn) to see the show. We shared the rest of my beer and played catch up on each other's lives. He and his girlfriend (also my college buddy) had drove up in their car with another friend, and they graciously gave me a ride back to my borough. We listened to "Positive Jam" and talked about the randomness of life. It was an awesome night. And I didn't have to post anything on FB to make it happen, all I had to do was be there.
I think if I've learned anything from this social experiment, it's that: My glorious kicka*s life existed before I started broadcasting and tuning in via updates and uploads. It still exists, and real time is best experienced by looking up at the world rather than down at my iPhone.
I'll leave you with that, and this.
Hoppy Easter, y'all.
Anyway, what up thugs? Sorry for tapering off in these ever important last days, but fortunately my life is full of so much sh*t that I sometimes don't even have the time to write about it all. I say fortunately because the sh*t causing me to fall asleep on my couch every night around 9PM is daylight hours full of scrambling to pull shoots together, which is fancy talk for "I'm employed." Also there's the extracurriculars like
- dinner with a dear friend & his BF up from O-town
- Bob Schneider
- the the real beer garden
- doing my taxes and finding out I'm getting a phat refund
- The Hold Steady
Which brings me to this:
How could I be mad at this man for making me tired and useless to the blawg-o-sphere? He rocked my f*cking socks off last night, and that's exactly what I needed after this b-a-n-a-n-a-s week. Becoming utterly exhausted by jumping, yelling along and getting mashed around with the sweaty bodies of other drunk happy people is its own form of expression. It's like f*cking all your closest friends, who also happen to be complete strangers. I woke up bleary-eyed but bushy-tailed this AM to check my work email for some last minute details of a project happening on Monday - still wearing a bright blue plastic over-21 bracelet and smiling, with ridiculous hair mussed up from the Grade-A pure rockin':
Rock is like rainbows, people. It's magical and beautiful, and when it happens it's like the sun is shining just for you.
Ok, enough, I'm obvi still high on the Steady. So, I was supposed to go to the show last night w/ my BFFNYC (not to be confused w/ my BFFTPA or my BFFNYACK), but she had to cancel at the last minute so I went alone. I love to be alone, we know this, so I happily filled up a coffay cup with wine to pre-game and jumped on Metro-North because the show was north of the city in a place called Ardsley. I was thoroughly rocked, drunk on Captain Lawrence and good feelings. While working on my last-call beer and about to call a cab to take me back to the train station, I heard someone say my name.
me- Wha?
Ryan- It is you! I was like, that looks like...and then I was like no IT IS!
me- Dude!
Ryan- Dude!
me- Dude.
And the conversation continued...As it turns out my friend Ryan, who I know from our college days back in FL, is a die-hard Hold Steady fan too and had also come up (from Brooklyn) to see the show. We shared the rest of my beer and played catch up on each other's lives. He and his girlfriend (also my college buddy) had drove up in their car with another friend, and they graciously gave me a ride back to my borough. We listened to "Positive Jam" and talked about the randomness of life. It was an awesome night. And I didn't have to post anything on FB to make it happen, all I had to do was be there.
I think if I've learned anything from this social experiment, it's that: My glorious kicka*s life existed before I started broadcasting and tuning in via updates and uploads. It still exists, and real time is best experienced by looking up at the world rather than down at my iPhone.
I'll leave you with that, and this.
Hoppy Easter, y'all.
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